Watch your mouth

I cry sometimes. Different things can set me off, a remark: ‘you really have become very deaf’, someone giving me a shove to get past (most probably after asking me politely half a dozen times to stand aside), meeting up with friends and failing to take part in the conversation or just feeling tired and isolated.

I try to do the crying on my own. After all, it might relieve stress and pain in me but it’s only upsetting for others to witness. However, there have been times where I have been taken by surprise and I have burst out crying before I was able to stop it.

One such time I was seeing my ENT consultant at the local hospital. I have been seeing him for the last seven years and usually the visit would go like this: ‘lets have a look at your ears’, ‘lie on the couch so we can give them a clean’, ‘good, see you in 6 months time’. He would smile, make his notes and I would be on my way, the only variation being I sometimes would be given a prescription for some drops or cream.

This time he looked in my ears as usual and then he asked ‘how are you?’. It was his own fault; giving me a false sense of security and then, popping me a question that made me think – something I purposely avoid in order to stay cheerful. Anyway, I cried buckets and apologized just as much and despite him keeping a calm and friendly exterior, I’m sure he won’t ask me how I am for a long time to come.