Laughter at the End of the Tunnel

Tony takes inspiration from Dame Evelyn Glennie

TV gets away with it all the time, so why shouldn’t I? I’m going to repeat a subject – Dame Evelyn Glennie. But this time I want to focus on the hope she brings to us, the hearing partners.

Last week Dame E was on the radio, not just her speaking but taking part in conversations. I’ll be the amongst the first to say that there’s no reason why a deaf person shouldn’t be doing that, deafness shouldn’t exclude anyone from doing anything apart from actually hearing.

Easy for me to say, but with a little forethought and adaptation everything else should be possible. The salient point, for me, is that Dame E proves what is possible, with time and practice.

I hope that doesn’t seem condescending or patronising, it’s just that the early days of living with deafness throws up so many obstacles for the deafened and hearing partners alike that the simplest way to cope is retreat. For us, lipreading has become the greatest communication assistance but it took time and seemed almost too daunting at first.

The ‘going deaf experience’ was overwhelming for Sue and terrifying for me, I knew we would cope; we just had to find out how. Well, we did, with help – especially from Hearing Link.

During those early years I tried to be consistently supportive but the difficulties did seem overwhelming far too often. Oddly though, Dame Evelyn popped up on TV (or I’d hear her on the radio) more often than I’d have expected and seeing her, such an outgoing and confident individual, was proof that things would improve.

Holding someone up as an example is often the fastest way for that person’s photo to turn up on a dartboard. Dame E, however, is so self-effacing that I’m sure no one would feel grumpy at what she has achieved. On the radio the other week she explained how difficult lipreading can be, the demands of group situations how tiring the skill is. Obviously that is supportive to the deaf community and informs the world how to speak with a lipreader. But I wonder if Dame Evelyn is aware just how much reassurance she offers the hearing partners and families.

I’d better stress that that I’m not infatuated with her, I don’t have pictures of her stashed away or anything unsavoury like that. It’s just that when I was most anxious for Sue’s future I heard Dame E laughing and that gave me confidence and hope.

And for anyone experiencing the early, difficult, days of lost hearing – take heart because things can get easier, just don’t try and get through on your own.